Living To Die. By Cesar Reyes

One day I will not be here
From the day I was born
My countdown began
I’m not sure what I’ve accomplished
Do I dare even call me a man?
Despite the faith that I have
I don’t know what happens when my countdown ends
My image is nothing but a foggy memory to my family & friends
From the day I was born
I’ve just been living to die
I don’t know how far my echoes will travel
If someday someone will shed light on my web of lies
That each poem that I echo represents one tear
That even though I wrote of strength and triumph
I lived my life in fear
From the day I was born
I was introduced to the world as my cemetery
I write poems instead of shedding tears
Because they are something I cannot carry
My poems are dark, but they are as clear as day
When my countdown ends, to the cemetery I leave behind
My poems are what I give
Let them remember me by saying
That from the day I was born
I was dying to live

Breath. By Cesar Reyes

For me to write is to breath

To care is to give

For me to die is to surrender

To cry is to heal

For me to fall is the only way to rise

To smile is to be distracted

For me to sleep is to wander

To scream is to release

For me to bleed is to show im real

To dream is to see

For me to hold back is to show fear

To love is to fly

For me the only way to live is to believe

In Between . By Cesar Reyes

I smile too often to be depressed

I frown too much to say I'm happy

I've hurt too many people to say Im weak

I've given up so many times I cant say i'm strong

Im too paranoid to trust anybody

When I do trust people, I get betrayed

I'm too young to understand

Im too old to feel scared

Im too smart to be a drug addict

Im too stupid to recognize my own worth

I have too much to say I'm poor

I don't have enough to keep me going

I feel too much pain to say I'm dead

I feel too empty to say I'm alive

I don't have enough reason to keep on believing

But I have too much faith in my heart to ever stop

Letting Go. By Cesar Reyes

 
For every goodbye
I have to remind myself that not everyone is meant to be with you forever
So you should appreciate them, while you cross paths in this short thing we call life
 
For every goodbye
I get sad, and I feel like I’m losing something inside of me
It feels like I’m losing a part of my life that always felt familiar
 
For every goodbye
I have to let go a little part of my heart
And I pray that that person takes good care of that little part of me, wherever life takes them
 
For every goodbye
I take a minute to sit down and reminisce
And I am reminded of all the reasons I am going to miss that person
 
For every goodbye
I wonder if Ill ever see that person again
And if I should run into them many years from now, will they greet me as a friend, or walk past me like a stranger
 
 
 

Fallen Dream. By Cesar Reyes

I close my eyes and dream
That I have a different life
That I live in a cloud
That I don’t remember what tears are for
 
I close my eyes and dream
That I can breathe peacefully on a never before seen beach
That I live in an ocean with underwater rainbows
That I can jump out of the water when I get tired and fly away anywhere
 
I close my eyes and dream
That pain has nothing to do with love
That happiness won’t always be a pursuit,
That it is an actual destination
 
I close my eyes and dream
That I am swimming inside a single drop of rain
That that rain drop falls inside a rose
That that rose is given to the girl of my dreams

I still believe. By Cesar Reyes Torres

When all about me, I was surrounded by pain and sadness
God laid out a safe path for me to walk on
When I strode away from that path
God forgave me and let me come back, and continue the journey he laid out for me

When I felt like I had no way out of the prison I had put my life in
God opened the door and set me free
When I failed to find a reason to continue moving forward
God gave me a purpose

When I was tempted by distractions
God kept me resolute and strong
When I stumbled to the ground and felt that I couldn’t move past mountains of despair
God picked me up, he moved those mountains, and he let me proceed

When I thought I had done all that I could do
God gave me the hope to say to myself, do a little bit more
When I grew tired and weak from the journey
God gave me the strength to keep going and show others that I still believe